Bat-plant & Rose? No thanks.

Why is there an angry pirate behind me?

Cuz teh Pirats dont leik peeple hoo dont liek teh plantse.

Oh crapp, hav I getted teh Intarwebz dizees?

Yes, i'm afraid so. It's fatal.

Did you release that demon?

No, that was him -->.

Wanna celebrate my 2000^th post?

Oh hey congrats!

What do you have in mind?

Let's celebrate with a PARTAY!

*Ten party-filled hours later*

Wasn't that party awesome?

Totally dude. It was like, dude, the best party, dude, ever, dude.

What did I smoke, dude?

Nothing. You're just naturallly stupid.

Oh crap! Did my looooooove powers kick in again?
Because that would be horrible.

Uh-oh. I think so, and i don't have any patches...

Would averting my eyes make things easier?

Yes. Look at me. LOOOOOOOOK!

Why do stars fall down from the sky, every time, you walk by?
_{I have to go to sleep. Bye steak, bye Vee and a very special kiss to you.}

steak gets a special handshake.

They are commiting suicide.

Where did this dinner come from?

I don't know...I mean, did you wish for it?
_{G'night Ren!}

...Is that wine?

Amontillado, in fact.

Aren't you glad I finally got wine?

Sure, now that I'm going to bed.
/sarcasm

Can I have a cup?

Sure. Now leave us to our dinner.

Wait, why is the turkey still clucking?

I'm fairly sure that it's undercooked.

Was there another option, aside from turkey?

Well, yes, ribs. But that's not very fancy.

Is it still good enough?

It's fine. At least Amontillado and Ribs sound okay together.

Did you cook this? Or did you order?

Cooked it.

Wait, did someone press the timefreeze button?
Gotta go. Sorry to interrupt our se- er, dinner.

Yes, Me. I have work to do.
_{Later steak!}

What's the key ingredient to creating unicorns?

Paprika.
Turns out, I'm back faster than I thought!

Is that an earthquake?

No, that's the bass from the stereo.
_{Ah i see.}

Why is your stereo twice the size of your house?

For awesomeness factor.

Why didn't you do the same?

I ordered one from Ikea but i never put it together.

I'm not lazy...right?

No, just sexy. Too sexy. I'm going to have to take you into prison for sexiness.

Will you comply?

No, I'm resisting arrest and i know my miranda rights.

What are you gonna do about it?

Restrain you with handcuffs. And a corset.

What now?

Now I lurk, cuz this is getting goooooooood.

Or did I just ruin it?

A bit.

Vaude, why are you struggling? That just makes it worse!

Ugh...believe it or not this isn't comfortable.

Can you at least loosen the handcuffs?

Sure. Why not. Now get into your cell.

Okay, time's up.

Did I do all that for nothing?

Probably, now take the damned corset off.

You know that you take your weird pick-up lines too far, right?

That wasn't a pickup line, I put that on you so you couldn't throw up, and kill me with, that knife you hid in your stomach.

How did you even get that knife down there in the first place?

Bets never end well with me. But hey i got $20 for swallowing it whole.

...So I can't take it off or throw up the knife?

No, you can take it off. Just don't stab me.

Does Heaven have a hitman?